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You
Are Special
Silent tears fall on the pillow tonight. A black wave washes over an empty,
disappointed heart.
A bad hair day… acne… a terrible first impression on the visitor at church
today. A broken dish, a harsh criticism. Gossip overheard. A bad grade on math. A scale that registers ten pounds
higher than she wants. And no indication that tomorrow will be any better, in any way.
When others shine, she glowers; when others curl, she frizzes; when others soar, she stumbles. And
so tonight, when others laugh, she is crying.
I am a failure… I am always messing up… I can do nothing right.
Nothing – it seems to echo in the night.
You can do nothing right… you look terrible… no wonder no one likes you… tomorrow you will fail
again… you are nothing… you are nothing…
That’s a lie. It’s not true. Don’t believe it.
Listen. I have something to say. I’ve felt this way before.
This is a lie, what you’ve been thinking. Do you want to know the truth?
Okay, here it is. You are special. You are beautiful. You are a one-of-a-kind jewel.
Yeah, I know your hair’s a mess. You flunked your math test. I heard. But that doesn’t change the
truth. You’re still special. You are beautiful.
These thoughts – this black wave of thoughts about to flood you in a sea of despair – is from Satan.
Don’t listen. Don’t believe it. It’s not the truth.
The truth is like a shining star of wonderful, incredible light that will make your darkness vanish.
Let me show you – dry your tears – look!
The Lord has chosen you as His peculiar treasure.1 He loves you with an everlasting love,
2 and He will never change.3
He created you; He formed you. Do not be afraid – He has redeemed you. He calls you by your name;
He knows you and treasures you as an individual. He wants you, and you are His. You are precious in His sight.4 He
loves you. He calls you His jewel.5
But I look terrible. Look at me; I’m a mess. I’m so clumsy. My hair never turns out. My face is
always breaking out. I’m ten pounds overweight…
Shhhh – you are beautiful! Did you know God formed you from the dust of the
ground6 and created you in His own image?7 Come on, you don’t believe you descended from a monkey. Nor are you a
cookie-cutter person turned out from a factory just to be one more human on the planet.
You are like a snowflake – unique, precious, beautiful. God made you, and in His opinion, what He
makes is very good.8
You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Feel your heartbeat – God keeps it beating because He cares,
because He has a purpose. God gives you breath. His works are marvelous!
He wove you together and wrote you in His book. He planned you before you existed; He fashioned you
special.9 He formed your nose, your mouth. He designed your hair. He knows everything about you 10 and He
loves you.
I can’t believe I’m beautiful. Not when I see her over there. She just does everything right.
She’s thin, fashionable, sparkly. She sounds good. Everyone likes her. She’s so confident, always knows what she’s doing. I just
don’t measure up…
Don’t compare yourself with her. Don’t measure yourself by her success – or anyone else’s.
11 By the grace of God you are who you are, and His grace given to you is not in vain.12
God doesn’t want everyone to turn out like her. He wants her to be her, and you to be you. He sets
every member in the body – every person in His Church – as it pleases Him. He makes each of us different, special, unique, to work
together and complement each other.13
You’re not supposed to be like her. You’re just as beautiful, just as special, but you’re different,
because you’re you.
Okay, maybe you’re right on the appearance thing, but you don’t really know me. I’m – well, I’m
always sinning. I’m a big mess-up. If you really knew me, you’d hate me.
Remember that your salvation isn’t by your good works, but by God’s mercy.14 That’s
because all of us have sinned,15 and even our righteousness is as filthy rags.16
God knows you are sinful. He knows the deepest thoughts of your heart, the motives and imaginations
that you hide from everyone else.17
And guess what? He loves you anyway. He wants a relationship with you, and He wants you to be a part
of His work, even though you’ve sinned. That’s why He died – that’s why He bled, because you needed another chance. And now you’ve
got one. He can transform murderers.18 He can forgive you.
He promises that if you confess your sin – any sin – He will forgive you and cleanse you.
19 As far as the east is from the west, so far will He remove your sins from you.20 They will be gone,
forgotten. You will be new, clean.21
Salvation – and day-by-day success – is none of your goodness, and all of His mercy. And as high as
the heavens are above the earth, so great is His mercy toward you.22
God may forgive, but people remember. They don’t always give second chances. Criticism, gossip,
rejection – that hurts.
People look on the outside, but God looks at your heart.23 What other people think and
say can hurt, but it’s what God thinks and says that really matters.
Remember His love is everlasting – it doesn’t change!24 Nothing – not the worst day in
the world – can separate you from His love.25 He accepts you.26 He forgives you. And He can heal your hurt
and meet your need.
Okay, so I have another chance – I want to make a fresh start. But I feel totally unable, like I
can’t even live tomorrow. I’ll just mess up again. I can’t do this.
Without God, you can’t do it – you can do nothing.27 But with God, you can do all
things.28 It’s not your ability that matters; it’s His grace.29
God’s grace is sufficient for you. His strength is made perfect in your weakness.
30 He will give you the victory through Jesus Christ.31 God will supply all your need.32 In the
day when you cry, He will answer and strengthen your soul.33 Believe it! Claim it! Not one thing will fail of all the
good things which God has spoken concerning you – all will come to pass.34
But what if I don’t see those promises coming true in my life? What if I fail – again?
God never promised an easy journey. But when you’re troubled, you don’t have to be distressed. When
you’re perplexed, you don’t have to despair. When you’re persecuted, you are not forsaken. When you feel cast down, you’re not
destroyed.35 God will never leave you; never will He forsake you.36
Whatever God wants, He will do.37 He is in control of everything, your life included! In
His sovereignty, He will make sure that all things work together for your good.38
And when you feel like a failure, He gives you the promise that love never fails.39
I am afraid of what the future holds. There may be grace for today, but what of tomorrow? Life
seems so uncertain, so lonely.
God knows the plans He has for you – plans to give you a hope and a future.40 No good
thing will He withhold from you.41 He will give you strength for each day.42 When you follow Him, your path
will be like a shining light that shines more and more.43 You will go from strength to strength until you appear before
God. 44
His plan for your future is sweeter than your sweetest dreams, above all you ask or imagine.
45 No one who trusts in Him will be desolate.46 No eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor has it entered into
anyone’s thoughts, the terrific things God has prepared for you.47
God’s right hand has spanned the heavens 48 – and He’s holding you in that hand.
49 After all, you’re His jewel, acne and all. You’re His peculiar treasure, even when you fail a first impression.
And you know what? When everyone else gives up and leaves, and you cry by yourself at night, He’s
knocking at your heart, wanting to be your dearest Friend.50 When you’re in the dark of despair, He’s shining the
wondrous light of His truth. When you feel ugly, He says you’re beautiful.
Because He loves you very, very much. ©
1. Psalm 135:4
2. Jeremiah 31:3
3. Hebrews 13:8
4. Isaiah 43:1-4
5. Malachi 3:17
6. Genesis 2:7
7. Genesis 1:27
8. Genesis 1:31
9. Psalm 139:14-16
10. Psalm 139:1
11. 2 Corinthians 10:12
12. 1 Corinthians 15:10
13. 1 Corinthians 12:18-28
14. Titus 3:5
15. Romans 3:23
16. Isaiah 64:6
17. Psalm 139:1-12 |
18. 1 Timothy 1:16
19. 1 John 1:9
20. Psalm 103:12
21. 2 Corinthians 5:17
22. Psalm 103:11
23. 1 Samuel 16:7
24. Jeremiah 31:3
25. Romans 8:38-39
26. Romans 15:7
27. John 15:5
28. Philippians 4:13
29. Zechariah 4:6
30. 2 Corinthians 12:9
31. 1 Corinthians 15:57
32. Philippians 4:19
33. Psalm 138:3
34. Joshua 23:14 |
35. 2 Corinthians 4:8-9
36. Hebrews 13:5
37. Psalm 135:6
38. Romans 8:28
39. 1 Corinthians 13:8
40. Jeremiah 29:11
41. Psalm 84:11
42. Deuteronomy 33:25
43. Proverbs 4:18
44. Psalm 84:7
45. Ephesians 3:20
46. Psalm 34:22
47. 1 Corinthians 2:9
48. Isaiah 48:13
49. John 10:28
50. Revelation 3:20
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More
Bananas?
By Jennifer Steele
“Please get at least twenty pounds of bananas so that I can dehydrate them,” Mom had said.
Here I was in the grocery store, needing to get tons and tons of bananas, not only for her, but also
for the family that I work for as a nanny. There was a big sale on the bananas, and both of our families happened to love them. I
glanced around as I rolled several sacks off the roll on the corner of a nearby display, wondering if anyone was watching as I
took them over and set the wad of bags down to begin loading them up with the bunches on sale.
Now, in case you didn’t know, one bag of bananas is conservative. Two bags is normal. Three means
you are making banana bread and pudding all in one day, and beyond that…well, let’s just say I was beginning to attract
attention.
Seeking to keep our families’ bananas separate, (since both moms had ordered different amounts), I
had a large pile in the seat of the cart, and was working on my dear mother’s twenty-pound order. I bagged, and bagged, and
bagged some more as unsuspecting, innocent persons one by one came up to the bananas, wondering who this strange girl was who was
quickly and single-handedly emptying out the display.
My situation had gone from strange to comical to ridiculous. One small, frail elderly woman
approached my basket clutching her own four or five bananas in one lonely bag, and stared as if she were seeing one of the Seven
Wonders of the Ancient World. A single cart. A single girl. And heaps and piles of bananas.
I took note of my situation more closely at this point and realized perhaps I needed to make an
emergency call on my cell phone. I rolled my basket over out of the way, trying to look like I emptied the banana display every
day of my life, and called Mom.
“Are you sure you wanted twenty pounds?” I asked her. By my estimation, I would need at least
double of what I currently had.
“Well, it’s a great sale, so I really could use that many, but whatever you think,” was her amiable
response.
“Because this is getting a little ridiculous,” I informed her. Of course, how could she realize the
severity of my plight? The difficulty was that people were beginning to look at me strangely...
I got just a few more bags, hoping that it would be enough to suffice, and continued on with my
other shopping, somehow having this nagging feeling that I had not gotten enough. When I got home, she smiled in her mom sort of
way, and said, “Well, that will almost fill up the dehydrator.”
I proceeded to explain to her what had happened, and she and I laughed, but I knew exactly why I had
not gotten the full twenty pounds.
My problem was a common but subtle one. In reality, each one of us has our own “banana basket” that
we, too, are working on.
Proverbs 29:25 says, “The fear of man bringeth a snare: but whoso putteth his trust in the Lord
shall be safe.” How many times have we thought, “I wonder what she thinks of me? I wonder if I look okay? Is my hair the right
style for this occasion? This mountain of bananas looks pretty crazy here… I’d better stop before I look too strange. I hope my
twenty-six siblings behave well, so that we can make a good impression on so-and-so…” and on it goes.
We tend to care very much about what the people around us think. We listen for hints of either
approval or disapproval, whether perceived or real, and base our actions accordingly. This has been a challenge for me. The
entanglement comes when we believe the subtle lie that says, “It is important to please them, because you want to be a good
testimony and a good example.” At this point we are willing to go to any lengths to fit in or feel approval. Why does this result
in what Proverbs terms a “snare”?
If we are seeking to please men, our standards will continually have to change.
Think of a person that is characterized by Revelation 3:16, “…thou art lukewarm, and neither cold
nor hot…” We are hot when we are filled completely with our God who is a Consuming Fire. Why are others cold? Because the
chill of the world has gripped them, numbing them to God’s truth. But this matter of lukewarm – is that not created by a mixture
of both cold and hot? We settle in this dangerous place when we have one eye on the world and its praise, and the other on the God
who has not yet become our all.
People are fickle. They are human. What may be approved in one circle, may be rejected in another.
Yet we choose to be governed by the outward whims of those around us! Certainly, we should be under authority, and respond to
God’s direction in that regard. But we are speaking of a fear, a feeling of insecurity springing from the fact that we don’t think
we will be good enough.
When I was working for a Christian ministry in Illinois, I had a supervisor who really liked the
desks to be kept neat at all times. I am not a naturally neat person, so this was a challenge for me. I tried, but did not keep my
desk as nice as it should have been. She would walk by, and quietly instruct me to put some of the papers away, or give me some
folders with which to organize it all. After she left, instead of receiving her positive criticism in a healthy manner, I resolved
firmly that it would never happen again, and oh, I can’t believe I did that! Next time, the top of my desk will be
sterilized, not a speck, not a crumb…
Sound familiar? I perceived that her opinion of me was lowered because of this crime
J, and cringed at the thought of her thinking less of me.
This is because the root of a fear of man is pride. The fear of man is bondage, a lie that
says we must perform well to be liked by others. We cannot serve two masters. Paul spoke of this plainly to the Galatians: “For
do I now persuade men, or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ.” -
Galatians 1:10.
Fear of man is a sin. We are commanded repeatedly in Scripture to “Fear not!” What does the
Lord follow up with as a reminder? “For I am with thee…” We can never be good enough to please men. We can never fit the
nebulous mold of Christian perfection! Where is the error in our logic? Why are we so driven to try? We crave acceptance,
approval, and praise. My friend, please know that your craving will never be satisfied until you find your needs, all of them,
met in the Almighty God.
What we fear, we will worship. Who are we to worship? God, and God alone. When our hearts are
bound by the drive to perform, to please, and to prosper in the praise of men, we are blinded to God’s heart toward us. His heart
yearns for our attention, our worship. How it must grieve Him to see us running around gathering scraps of worthless praise from
mere men! If your self-worth is based on the praise of men, it will be very shaky. Choose to find your needs met in a God who
is in love with you, and you will be unshakable.
“The fear of the Lord tendeth to life: and he that hath it shall abide satisfied; he shall not be
visited with evil.” - Proverbs 19:23. We as the daughters of the King must ask the Lord to replace our fear of man with a
holy, awesome fear of God. Set your gaze upon Jesus, the Lover of your soul, and believe firmly that you are more than a conqueror
in Him. Believe Him when He says, “...Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with
loving kindness have I
drawn thee.” - Jeremiah 31:3.
In 1 John 4:18, we are given a truth that has become very precious to my heart. “There is no fear
in love; but perfect love casts out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.” Whenever I
am fearing, I am discounting the fact that I am already accepted to the fullest by the One who loves me eternally.
When by God’s grace, we stand confident in His love, His approval, and His acceptance, we are
enabled to reach beyond ourselves to meet the needs of others, rather than hoping our needs will be met by them. Imagine yourself
running the race spoken of in Hebrews, with many crowds gathered around. Some are tossing roses. Others are booing. Still others
sit perplexed as to why you are running that way at all. But you run on, never slowing, never stopping, never turning to watch the
crowd, for none of the paltry tokens matter any longer. You are running for an Audience of One.
How many bananas does He want in your basket? ©
How to Conquer the Fear of Man
By Melanie Beachy
The fear of man is something I have struggled with greatly in the past, and
continue to struggle with now. I have definitely not obtained complete victory in this area, but I pray that the Lord will
continue to mold me and cleanse me completely from it.
I have always cared a great deal about what others think about me. I want to be recognized for my
accomplishments; I want others to notice what I have done for them and commend me for it.
Probably most of us can admit to having the fear of man at one time or another, and for many of us
it is a daily struggle. But how does God view a fear of man? I think it would be good for us to take a closer look at God’s point
of view concerning this issue. I think many of us tend to look at it lightly, simply excusing ourselves in our minds because it
comes so naturally.
If we care more about what others think than what Christ thinks, we are actually placing man above
Christ in our lives. Ouch!! When you
think of it from this perspective, it certainly sounds quite serious!
Galatians 1:10 says, “For do I now persuade man, or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet
pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ.” This verse actually says right out that if we fear men more than God, we
are not His servants. I think all of us can say that we truly desire to be God’s servant, all glorious within. We want to be in
His will and serve Him with all of our hearts! But the fear of man keeps getting in the way, distracting us from being servants of
the King.
What if God asks us to dress differently then most of our friends? Listen to different music? Wait
for Him to bring your life partner rather than playing the dating game? How often does the fear of man enter into these decisions
and more? For me, I have to admit it’s often.
“The fear of man bringeth a snare: but whoso putteth his trust in the Lord shall be safe.” -
Proverbs 29:25. How true that is! I have often experienced the feeling of being ensnared by worry about what others are going to
think if I do this or that. It’s especially easy when you are in a group of people to focus more on being like everyone else than
on being like Christ and who He created us to be.
Is there a solution to the fear of man?
To find the solution, let’s look at the cause of the fear of man.
It would have to be a love of self. Naturally, we
wouldn’t worry about what others thought of us unless we were concerned for ourselves.
So first, we must die to self. This is something that will have to occur daily many times. But by
the grace of God we can triumph! (See 1 Corinthians 15:10, 57-58.) We should become so wrapped up in thinking about others, that
thoughts of ourselves will not often occur! We must learn to die to self, and to
ask Christ to live in us and shine through us.
Secondly, we must remember what our life is all about! Are we here to please God, or to please man?
In Proverbs 19:23, we are promised satisfaction and protection from evil if we fear the Lord.
Thirdly, we must die to our reputation. Can we truly say with Paul, “For me to live is Christ,
and to die is gain”? - Philippians 1:21. We must learn to give our reputation to Christ. It’s certainly not easy to give up to
Christ what others think of us, but it sure beats all the worry and fear we’ll have otherwise!
Fourth, our main objective in life must be to love the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, mind,
and strength, and to love our neighbor as our self. Purposing to do this brings into perspective how truly unnecessary it is to
fear man.
Sisters, fearing the Lord above man is one of the hardest things to do in life, as it goes against
our fleshly nature. But the blessings that follow far outnumber the struggles it takes to attain it. “By humility and the fear
of the Lord are riches, and honour, and life.” - Proverbs 22:4. Just look at the promise of the great rewards accompanied with
fearing the Lord!
Let us remember that “...he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of
Jesus Christ” - Philippians 1:6b.
Be encouraged! Overcoming the fear of man is something we must give to the Lord, and ask Him to
overcome and give victory. May His peace and love be with you! ©
There Is No Fear
in Love
By Amy Vest
“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear...” - 1 John
4:18.
What a precious thing a heart of love for others is! A person with a heart of love for others is
someone we are drawn to and admire. One with this heart can change the world around them and impact eternity. Yet, how do we
develop this priceless gift in our lives?
A heart of love for others is something that I believe we all desire to have. We know that loving
others is to be a vital part of our lives – is it not one of the two greatest commandments that our Savior gave to us? First, and
definitely most important, He commanded us to love Him with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength. Then He commanded us to
love our neighbor as ourselves.
It is amazing how incredibly hand-in-hand these two go! As we love the Lord with all our hearts,
love for others comes naturally. But when we divide our focus between the Lord and ourselves, our spring of love for others is
quenched. For in loving the Lord and ourselves (which we naturally tend toward in our old nature), our eyes are focused not only
on Him and pleasing Him, but also on ourselves and pleasing ourselves. As a result, we begin to be very concerned about what
others think of us.
It is at this place where we begin to care what others think, that the fear of man sneaks in and
starts its devastating effect. We begin to become consumed with what others are thinking of us, or what they might think if we do
or say something. If you are like me, we tend to try to excuse this as seeking not to offend them. (Of course, this is not saying
to always speak your mind to everyone on every matter. Rather, it is simply not fearing what they will think when you walk in
obedience to the Lord and His leading in your life.)
I have found that when I am solely seeking to please the Lord, and am fearing Him alone, that His
love flows through all I do in a way that no one is offended. (That is, except for those the Lord convicts.) It is so freeing!
I strongly believe that the fear of man is one of Satan’s greatest tools to inhibit us from being
all that the Lord meant for us to be. When we are fearing the Lord alone and seeking only to please Him, He uses us as
an incredible vessel of His love for others. This is the answer, my friends! This is where we find the incredible joy and freedom
in loving others – in fearing the Lord alone and being a vessel through which the Lord
will love others.
These are the two key things: first fearing the Lord alone, loving Him with all of our heart, and living
solely to please Him; and, secondly, surrendering ourselves fully as a vessel through which He
will love others.
Being a vessel is a vital part of having a heart of love for others. Our own love is so small and
shallow, so conditional and changeable, so empty and easily exhausted. Yet, our Savior’s love is so great and deep, so endless, so
unconditional and changeless, so true and pure, so constant and fulfilling. His love is designed to fill the needs of every heart;
yet, if we are not a clear vessel, His love will not flow freely through us.
Our job is to be a vessel that is pure, surrendered, and free from the fear of man. When we are in
this state, the Lord will fill us with His love, and we can truly have a heart of love for others. It is so precious!
In my life I have found such freedom in coming before the Lord daily and surrendering myself to Him.
I then ask Him to fill me with His love and to allow it to flow and radiate from me. The results are so incredible, because the
Lord does His amazing work, and I can take no credit because I was only a vessel. The rewards are mine, but the glory is His!
As we ask the Lord to fill us with His perfect love, we will begin to see people and life from a
different light. His perfect love in us motivates us not to be selfish – it is only concerned with the good of the one being
loved. Would the Lord’s perfect love allow someone He has brought into our life to die without ever hearing the good news of His
salvation? Could true love draw back at the chance to share a message that the Lord has taught us, because we fear their response,
or fear that we might stumble over our words?
I love the clear illustration of asking ourselves what our response would be if we saw the roof of a
house on fire, and the family who lived in it enjoying a meal in the dining room. Would we be too afraid that we might mess up our
words, or that they would reject us and decide to ignore the dangerous situation? I should hope none of us would! Rather, I think
that most of us would do all that we could to make sure that the family escaped to safety.
It is the same in our lives, my friends! Many people are in dangerous situations spiritually, and
they need someone who will come alongside them and guide them to safety. There are also those who, though their situation may not
be extremely critical, are crying out (inwardly, if not outwardly) for someone who will be willing to take a stand for right and
help them to do so, too. Having a heart of love for others is an important part in overcoming the fear of man. Often this love is
the only thing, aside from obedience to the Lord, that can cause us to overcome the fear of man.
We fear man because we desire so much to be loved and accepted. We fear that in reaching out we will
do something that will turn people off from us. Yet, if we realize that the source of true love and acceptance is in Jesus, we
will not fear man’s response.
In seeking to please Him alone, your outlook on life will be changed, and you will realize what
truly is important in life. You will understand more and more that it is not man’s response to you that matters. Rather, it is
what you do, for whom you do it, and the spirit with which you do it that counts. On His way to the cross, Jesus was not met with
warm smiles and praise for what He was doing (and He was doing the greatest thing anyone will ever do). Yet, He faithfully
fulfilled His mission. His driving force behind what He did was fulfilling the will of His Father, and a heart of incredible love
for us. This is to be our driving force in life as well – to do the will of our Heavenly Father – with a heart of Christ’s great
love for others.
As we seek through His strength to overcome the fear of man out of a heart of love for others, we
must come to understand that it only matters if we please the Lord. And, as a result, we must endeavor to live our life with our
hearts full of His love. When we stand before God on that great day of judgment, all that will matter is if we have been faithful
to what He called us to do. For all of eternity, we will enjoy the rewards of our obedience. And for all of our life on earth, we
will enjoy the freedom and joy that results from fearing the Lord alone and living life out of a heart of love for Him and
others.
Let us be vessels of His love for others, dear sisters, seeking only to please Him. And only
eternity will show the great difference it will make! ©
What If?
By
Lisa Bode
Here is the pen, and here is the paper. This is your life, and you may write your
future.
Oh, thank you! You’re not serious. This is the opportunity of a lifetime, just what I’ve been
wanting.
I snatch the pen and begin scrawling, abbreviating in my haste. Here is my plan for this school
year. This is what I want with different relationships. And looking further ahead…
My doubts dissolve, my fears fade, as I detail how each aspect of my life should develop. Dates,
names, locations appear on the page. The uncertainty of life vanishes. The fog lifts and I draw my horizons. Now my path is clear
before me. No worries. No obstacles. I know what I want, and I know that I’ll get it, and nothing will stand in my way.
What a perfect dream.
But we face a far different reality, don’t we? We see the paper of our future – frighteningly blank
and uncertain. We reach for the pen, but it’s beyond our grasp. What we think, do, or say
in given situations – yes, that we can write. But it’s
everything and everyone else that worries us – the things we desperately want to have happen, or not happen – the things
over which we have no control at all.
We sit and stew. What can we do to reach the pen? What can we do to take control of our lives, to
guarantee that things really will work out the way we want? After all, we know. We know our needs, our desires; we know what’s
best; we have a terrific plan.
We stretch toward the pen again, and then we see who is holding it. God.
We pause. We wonder. Bible promises filter through our minds like rays of light. Nothing is
impossible with God. Ask, and you will receive. Hmm…
We’ll pray. We’ll ask for control of the pen. We’ll tell our plan to God and beg Him to make it
happen. We’ll dictate to Him exactly what to write.
A torrent of prayer, a shopping list of wants, flows to the throne of grace like an order to a
bakery.
Then we wait and watch. And hope. A day, a week passes.
No, no, no. This is not what we wanted. This is not what we planned. This is not working! A deluge
of doubt, a frenzy of fear, consumes us. God is not doing what we want. And there’s nothing we can do about it.
“What if’s” cling to us like leeches. What if I sit around at home while everyone else enters some
great ministry, or goes to college? What if I stay single forever? What if God forgets about me? What if He drives my life down
the drain?
Worry wears us to exhaustion. Finally we pause again. We wonder. There must be some solution.
Bible promises again. God knows the plans He has for us. The Lord is my shepherd. Hmm…
We’ll pray again, a little differently this time. We want the pen, but it doesn’t look like we’ll
get it. God has a different plan that He’s writing – and we could adjust to it, if only we knew what it was. That way we would
know what to expect, what to ask Him to change, whether or not we could trust enough to follow.
God, I’m asking for details, specifics. Umm… okay, am I going to stay single forever? I’m very happy
single now, as long as I know this isn’t permanent. What is Your plan?
No good thing will He withhold from them that walk uprightly.
That’s very nice. Actually, I was hoping for a name and date…
Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which
God hath prepared for them that love him.
Well – we’ll try a different one. God, all my friends seem to know where they’re going in life, and
I’m stuck in a rut. What’s Your plan for my education, my ministry, my work? How’s all this going to work out?
As for God, His way is perfect. Trust in the Lord and do good; so shall you dwell in the land,
and verily you shall be fed. Faithful is He that calls you, who also will do it. He who began a good work in you will carry it on
to completion.
Pause. This is not what I hoped for. I wanted specifics, a blueprint, a tangible sign that
God’s plan really would make me happy.
God will supply all your need.
Silence. Okay. This is all I have to go on. I’m sitting here on my knees, and I have the Bible,
and I have this blank page of my future, and God’s hand is holding the pen, out of my reach.
Ouch. Sigh. Struggle. Silence again.
I have two options. I can writhe in my wants and worries, struggle to reach the pen. Maybe, if I try
really hard, I’ll succeed in spilling some ink of my own plan on the page. But to do that, I’d give up joy and peace and sink into
this pit of doubt and despondency. And all I’d have to show for my weary efforts and sleepless nights is an ink spill.
Or I can trust. Tell me those promises again, Lord.
As for God, His way is perfect. He satisfies your mouth with good things, so that your youth is
renewed like the eagle’s. He loves you with an everlasting love. He will not forget you; He has graven you on the palms of His
hands.
His thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways His ways. For as the heavens are higher
than the earth, so are His ways higher than your ways, and His thoughts than your thoughts.
They that seek the Lord shall not want any good thing. None of them that trust in Him shall be
desolate…
Trust. Can I trust You, Lord? The “what-if” leeches question. Will You drive my life down the drain?
Will You forget me? Will You lead me into a desert of loneliness?
Trust. Who are You, Lord? When’s the last time I opened my Bible and tried to find out?
I look to the cross. The arms outstretched. The crown of thorns. There I find Your perfect
sovereignty, Your heartbreaking passion, Your selfless love. Forever proven. Forever trustworthy.
Trust. This isn’t fun. In fact, it kind of hurts to pry my fingers off my own plans. But a peace is
beginning to seep into my troubled heart, a peace that I could never know otherwise.
Lord, You haven’t given me specifics. I don’t know what will happen. You haven’t told me.
But You have promised. But You have given your life for me. And I close my eyes to sight, and shut
out the fatalistic murmuring of those “what-if” leeches. And I ask for Your way, no matter where You lead, for Your plan, no
matter what You write.
Here – here is the paper. My life. My future. Could You please – no, I won’t ask. Would You give me
Your best? That’s what I ask.
Here is the pen, God. I know You’re a perfect writer. So I won’t try to get it into my own hands. I
won’t try to tell You what to write. I’ll wait – and look forward to – Your story.
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts…. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my
ways higher than your ways….”
I think I will memorize that. I will tell it to my what-if thoughts. ©
Developing
a Servant's Heart
By Lana Bode
Dear Sisters,
It was a busy Wednesday in mid-June. I was sick with a bad cold. I needed to visit my orthodontist
to get my braces adjusted. There were errands to run, school tests to take, a nursing home to visit, piano lessons to teach. The
day was stressful.
Finally, I shuffled upstairs late at night to collapse in bed. But Lisa met me on the way to remind
me that this article was due the next morning. I glanced at the clock, reached for a tissue, winced over my sore teeth, and found
a pencil and my notebook.
As I began brainstorming for what to write, I felt prompted to begin the article right then. I
glanced at the clock once more and reluctantly began. “Dear sisters...” It was only then that I was finally able to put into words
the lesson God has been teaching me – the lesson of focusing on Him and developing a servant’s heart. I see this truth illustrated
in the story of Mary and Martha.
Mary believed that Jesus was the Messiah and that He would die and be raised again. She showed this
faith by anointing Jesus with oil shortly before His death. (See John 12:1-8.)
Mary realized the importance of developing a close relationship with Jesus and making Him her All in
All. Jesus became her first priority as she focused on learning from Him. Her humility and love built within her a servant’s heart
– a heart that desired more than anything else to live within the will of Jesus.
Martha did not have that attitude. Rather, we see her in Luke 10 focusing on the details of her own
life – what to cook, when to clean, how to be a gracious hostess to the crowd that filled her home. Technically, she was serving.
Yet, her lack of a servant’s heart brought her a gentle rebuke from Jesus. What Martha was doing was important. We should cook,
clean, and be gracious. But we must not allow our work to become our first priority.
Mary did not receive praise for her actions but for her attitude. She moved the details of her life
aside in order that Jesus might become her first priority. She focused on Him and developed a servant’s heart to obey His
commands.
May the Lord help us all to develop true servant’s hearts as we learn to love Him and pour out our
lives for others. God bless you all! ©
Baking and Selling at a Farmer's Market
By
Sarah Bayer
Rules and regulations vary from farmer’s market to farmer’s market, but with
ours, you only have to become a member of the farm bureau for $20.00 a year, which is a great deal because of the profits you’ll
make selling your produce. It’s totally worth it!
With some farmer’s markets, they have special requirements for your kitchen. As far as the food goes
for the market that I go to, you cannot sell anything that is made with dairy products or that needs refrigeration.
Here’s what I typically bake each week for market: whole wheat bread, cinnamon raisin bread,
cinnamon rolls, apple pie, rhubarb pie, peach pie, sugar cookies, monster cookies, peanut butter cookies, oatmeal raisin cookies,
zucchini bread, pumpkin bread, banana nut bread, and granola. (See end of
article for recipes.) What I bake varies depending on the
kinds of fruits and vegetables that are in season and what people are in the mood for. For example, I have found that people
aren’t really in the mood for pumpkin bread in the summer, but in the fall they are.
Some other ideas of items that you can make and sell at farmer’s market are soap, jam, cookies in a
jar, dry salad dressing mix in a jar, dry homemade pasta, pretzels, buns, dinner rolls, and much, much more! Just be sure to check
out the rules ahead of time and bake away!
Set-up
You’ll need a canopy, table, tablecloth, chairs, and a money box. When I first started I didn’t have
a canopy because I couldn’t afford one. Then one day, one of my customers generously bought me one because he felt bad for me
sitting out in the sun, even though it didn’t really bother me. A canopy is a big help in shielding the produce from the sun (or
rain). Sometimes I tie a tarp to the back for added protection.
Building consistency with your customers is also important. This past summer I was out there selling
whether rain or shine.
Another thing that is very important is to bake the highest quality goods possible – this means no
hairs
J! It is also important to be consistent in what you make, in the size, and in the taste.
To help with consistent sizes, I make large cookies and measure them in a ¼ cup measuring cup, and I weigh my bread dough so that each loaf weighs the
same amount. If you decide to make large cookies, getting the right size and baking time is something that you just need to get
the knack of. For instance, after measuring and rolling the dough into balls, I flatten them with my hands – a little with the
oatmeal raisin and a lot with the peanut butter cookies. Each kind of cookie has a different consistency.
Packaging
It is important to display your produce in an orderly and appealing way. I package my produce with
bags from B&G Products. Their web site is www.bgpaper.com. They have a variety of different sizes. Since the bags are
long, I cut them with a paper cutter for my cookies. You can also get twisty ties from this company. I print the labels on our
computer using sticker paper. If you print labels on your computer, be sure to use a font that is easy to read. I also print
posters with prices on them and posters of specials.
Business
Here are the prices of everything that I sell (as
of the year 2002):
Cookies – package of six for $3.00
Double crust
pie – $7.00
Loaf of bread (1½ lb.) – $3.00
Cinnamon raisin bread – $3.75
Cinnamon rolls – seven for $3.75
Banana nut
bread – $2.00
Zucchini bread – $2.00
Granola – $2.00 a pound
Always be sure to be friendly and courteous, even with crabby people, those who criticize, or people
who are particular about things that seem very insignificant. One time a lady was mad about the bills I gave her for change. Be
humble about people’s suggestions, and don’t be disheartened if you only make a small profit the first time (or the first season,
for that matter). One guy made only twenty-five cents the first time he went.
The first time I baked for market, I earned only around $40 to $60 profit, which was only enough to
pay for ingredients for the next week. But as time went on, I began to make more and more. This past summer, I made $100 to $300 a
week. (It would depend on the weather and the town’s activities.) The Lord really blessed!
Over time you’ll find what the biggest demand is and how much to charge. But once you set a price,
keep it, unless of course something happens like the price of apples go up, or you’re not making a big enough profit. But don’t
let people talk you out of your price. I’ve had people complain about my prices and even try to bargain with me. But hey! I sell
it for what it’s worth to me! Sometimes I need to remind myself that it would be better to bring it home to my family than to sell
it for less. And by the end of the day, I’m usually sold out! If not, my family is delighted! My parents agreed to pay for the
electricity and the bread ingredients in exchange for my leftovers.
You can freeze leftover cookies for the next week. Just make sure that they are completely thawed by
the time you sell them. You can also keep granola for a long time. But everything else needs to be baked fresh because, after all,
that’s why they’re coming to you – for fresh products. I bake the granola early in the week because it’s time-consuming and
doesn’t need to be baked fresh. On Thursday, I bake the banana bread and cookies. I bake the bread and everything else on Friday
because it is most important for the bread and pies to be the freshest possible. And I sell on Saturday.
Sometimes I pass out free samples of mini cookies, or bread cut into small squares. People love
it!
I think I’ve pretty much included everything I know from baking for a farmer’s market. Everything
else just comes with time. Don’t get disheartened if the first time you try, your batch flops! Over the years that I’ve been
baking, I have made so many mistakes. It’s not even funny – especially when it’s the second or third time you’ve made the same
mistake. My most recent blooper was to put two tablespoons of sugar instead of salt in my bread. This seems to be an all-time
favorite with bakers – we’ve all done it! But keep on baking!
For you, things will be different than they are for me. Maybe you’ll make more money, maybe less.
Maybe the town you sell in will be smaller or bigger. Or maybe there isn’t a big demand for baked goods. But take heart! You’re
not only making a monetary profit, but you’re also learning valuable skills.
I love baking as well as cooking and, even though I sometimes get sick of it, I keep coming back to
it. I just can’t help but make another batch of cookies
J. I love it! Making desserts is
definitely my favorite! Happy baking!
Sarah's Recipes
Whole Wheat Bread
6 cups warm water
1 cup oil
1 cup honey
~ 18 cups whole wheat flour, divided
2 tbsp lecithin
¼ tsp vitamin
C
4 tbsp gluten
2 tbsp salt
3 tbsp instant active dry yeast
Preheat oven to warm. Place water, oil, honey, and 6 cups flour in a Bosch mixing bowl. Add
lecithin, vitamin C, gluten, salt, and yeast. Mix on speed one, adding remaining flour until the dough sticks to the sides a
little. Put lid on, increase speed to three, and let mix for four minutes. Spread oil onto a countertop; remove dough from bowl.
Divide into six equal parts, weigh, shape, and place into greased loaf pans. Place in warm oven for 15 minutes or until risen just
above the sides. Increase heat to 350 for 30 minutes. After removing loaves from oven, place immediately on cooling racks. Makes 6
loaves.
Pumpkin Bread
2/3 cup shortening
22/3 cups sugar
4 eggs
2 cups (16 oz.) pumpkin
2/3 cup water
31/3 cups flour
2 tsp baking soda
½ tsp cinnamon
1 tsp
cloves
2/3 cup coarsely ground nuts
2/3 cup raisins
Heat oven to 350. Mix all ingredients in given order. Pour into two greased loaf pans. Bake for 45
minutes or until toothpick inserted near center comes out clean. Makes 2 loaves.
Variation: substitute zucchini for pumpkin, omit cloves, and add 1 tsp vanilla.
Banana Nut Bread
2½ cups flour
½ cup white sugar
½ cup brown sugar
3½ tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
1¼ cups mashed bananas
3 tbsp
vegetable oil
1/3 cup milk
1 egg
1 cup chopped nuts
Heat oven to 350. Mix all ingredients. Pour into 2 greased loaf pans. Bake for 45 minutes or until a
toothpick inserted near center comes out clean. Remove from pans when completely cool. Makes 2 loaves.
Cinnamon Rolls
1 batch of bread dough, divided into six equal parts and weighed
cinnamon, divided
1½ cups brown sugar,
divided
3 cups chopped nuts, divided
Preheat oven to 350. Roll out one of the sections of dough. Sprinkle with cinnamon until dough is
covered. Sprinkle ¼ cup brown sugar. Evenly sprinkle ½ cup nuts. Roll. With scissors, cut into seven pieces. Place in a greased
pie pan. Repeat process with remaining ingredients. Bake for 30 minutes. Place pans on racks. Place on
styrofoam plates when cool.
Makes 42 rolls.
White Frosting (for cinnamon rolls)
½ cup butter, softened
¼-½ cup milk
1 tbsp vanilla
2 lbs. powdered sugar
Beat in given order until smooth. Place into
pastry bag with a large circle tip. Swirl frosting around each roll. Let dry for several minutes before packaging.
Caramel Frosting (for cinnamon rolls)
½ cup butter
1 cup brown sugar
½ cup milk
~ 2 cups powdered sugar
Boil butter and brown sugar for 1 minute. Add milk. Boil 1 minute. Let cool for several minutes. Put
in Bosch mixer and beat in powdered sugar until smooth. Place in a pastry bag with a large holed tip. Swirl onto rolls. Let sit
for several minutes before packaging.
Granola
3 gallons rolled oats
2 lbs. sliced or slivered almonds
3 cups pecans
1 cup shredded coconut
1 cup whole wheat
flour
2½ tbsp cinnamon
1 cup wheat germ
3 cups water
4½ cups oil
4½ cups honey
1 tbsp vanilla
Mix first seven ingredients. In a separate bowl, mix remaining ingredients. Stir all together. Add
more honey and oil if necessary to coat all dry ingredients. Spread on greased pans – not too thick, or it will not cook evenly.
Bake at 325 for 30 minutes, stirring every 10 minutes. Note: I usually substitute walnuts or another type of nut for almonds,
since almonds are so expensive. Makes 14 lbs.
Sugar Cookies
3 cups flour
½ tsp baking soda
1½ tsp baking powder
¼ tsp salt
1 cup butter, softened
2 eggs
1 cup sugar
1
tsp vanilla
Preheat oven to 350. Mix dry ingredients. In a separate bowl, mix remaining ingredients. Combine
both mixtures. Shape, and place on a greased cookie sheet. They will be sticky, but if you grease your hands, it will help. Bake
for 10-12 minutes. Makes 2 dozen.
Peanut Butter Cookies
1 cup white sugar
1 cup brown sugar
¾ cup shortening
1½ cups peanut butter
1 tsp vanilla
2 eggs
½ tsp salt
1
tsp baking soda
3 cups flour
Preheat oven to 350. Combine first six ingredients. In a separate bowl, combine remaining
ingredients. Stir all together. Shape. I measure it in a ¼ cup and roll into a ball. Flatten onto an ungreased cookie sheet, and
bake for 10 minutes or until fully cooked. Cool on racks. Makes 3 dozen. For market, I usually bake 2-4 batches.
Oatmeal Raisin Cookies
3 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
1 cup raisins
1 cup butter, softened
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup white sugar
2½ cups flour
1
tsp salt
1 tsp cinnamon
2 tsp baking soda
2 cups oats
¾ cup chopped pecans (opt)
Preheat oven to 350. Mix eggs, vanilla, and raisins; soak for 1 hour. Cream butter and sugars. Add
raisin mixture. Add remaining ingredients. Stir. Bake for 10-12 minutes. Makes 3 dozen. I usually make 2-4 batches.
Monster Cookies
12 eggs
4 cups brown sugar
4 cups white sugar
2 cups butter, softened
6 cups peanut butter
3 tsp vanilla
3 tbsp
baking soda
2 cups chocolate chips
18 cups oats
2 cups M&M’s
In a very large bowl, mix all ingredients in given order. Mix thoroughly after adding each
ingredient. Shape dough (using ¼ cup measure again), and place on a greased cookie sheet; flatten. Bake at 350 for 10-15 minutes.
Cool before removing from sheet. Makes 6-7 dozen. These cookies are my customer’s favorites. I only bake one of these huge
batches.
Pie Crust
2 cups flour
1 tsp salt
2/3 cup + 2 tbsp shortening
6 tbsp water
Combine flour and salt in a Tupperware bowl with a lid. Cut in shortening until mixture resembles
fine crumbs. Add water. Mix gently. Place lid on bowl, and shake until dough forms a ball. Remove from bowl. Divide into four
parts. Roll out on floured surface. Fold in half and then half again. Place in pie pan and unfold. Place filling on crust. If
making a double crust pie, repeat recipe and then crimp the edges. Makes 4 crusts.
Fresh Apple Pie
¾ cup sugar
¼ cup flour
½ tsp nutmeg
½ tsp cinnamon
dash salt
6 cups thinly sliced pared apples
Pastry for 9” double-crust pie
2 tbsp butter (opt)
Preheat oven to 425. Mix dry ingredients. Stir in apples. Pour into pastry-lined plate. Dot with
butter. Cover with top crust. Crimp edges, and poke with a fork. Bake 40-50 minutes. Makes 1 (9 inch) pie.
Fresh Peach Pie
1 cup sugar
¼ cup flour
¼ tsp cinnamon
5 cups sliced fresh peaches
1 tsp lemon juice
Pastry for 9” double-crust
pie
2 tbsp butter (opt)
Preheat oven to 425. Mix dry ingredients. Combine peaches and lemon juice; add to dry ingredients.
Pour into pastry-lined plate. Dot with butter. Cover with top crust. Crimp edges, and poke with a fork. Bake 35-45 minutes. Makes
1 (9 inch) pie.
Fresh Rhubarb Pie
11/3-12/3 cups sugar
1/3 cup flour
½ tsp grated orange
peel (opt)
4 cups chopped rhubarb, divided
Pastry for 9” double-crust pie
2 tbsp butter (opt)
Preheat oven to 425. Mix dry ingredients. Pour half of the rhubarb into pastry-lined plate. Sprinkle
half of the sugar/flour mixture onto rhubarb. Repeat layers. Dot with butter. Cover with top crust. Crimp edges, and poke with a
fork. Bake 40-50 minutes. Makes 1 (9 in.) pie. ©
Which One? - A Story
By Allison Wyatt
“What a great performance, Arlis,” Misty said to her older sister as the family drove home from the
girls’ voice recital. “I love the way your voice sounds when you sing the high notes!”
“Are you kidding?” Arlis moaned. “I was mortified.”
“Mortified?” Misty asked. “Well, at least you didn’t let on.”
“Well, I was definitely ready to sink through the floor,” Arlis replied. “But your song was
heavenly.”
“Thanks,” Misty said. “I’m not sure I agree with you, but at least I didn’t forget the words this
time.”
“Like I did, you mean?” Arlis’s voice sounded tight.
“Of course not, you silly goose,” Misty said and hugged her sister. “If you did such a terrible job,
why were all the people congratulating you?”
“Just being polite, of course,” Arlis answered, but she seemed cheered by Misty’s words. “I guess it
could have been worse. At least the notes were right.”
Misty giggled as their father turned into the driveway and stopped the car. “Well, let’s ask if we
can go drown our sorrows in that blackberry pie you made today.”
Arlis poked her in the ribs. “Food solves everything, right?”
Misty poked her back and jumped out of the car before Arlis could retaliate. “Right,” Misty called
back and she dashed through the door ahead of her sister.
The next evening, fourteen-year-old Misty was wiping the final breadcrumbs from the kitchen table.
Only one more day of kitchen duty, she planned, and then I’ll be—. The ringing of the phone cut through her thoughts
and silenced Arlis’ flawless vocal scales from the living room.
“I’ll get it,” Misty yelled as she ran to answer the phone. Grinning, she bumped her sister aside
and picked up the receiver.
“Hello?” she said. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Arlis shrug and pick up her music. “Sidney
residence, this is Misty speaking.”
“Hello, this is Tabitha Carey. May I talk to your dad or mom?”
“Sure. My dad is outside. I’ll get him,” Misty answered. She opened the sliding glass door, stepped
on the deck into the dusky calm of the evening, and gave the phone to her dad. A rose scented breeze twirled lazily around Misty
as she paused to drink in the approaching Missouri night. Shades of green melted with the twilight sky.
“Who was that?” Arlis asked as Misty stepped back inside. Arlis’ slender face wore an expectant
look.
“I don’t know.” Misty said. “Do you know a Tabitha Carey?”
“Um, it seems slightly familiar. Oh, yes. That’s right.” Arlis laughed as she followed Misty to the
cozy gable room they shared. “She was one of the people that came to our voice recital last night and told me how wonderful we
were.”
Misty grinned, remembering their conversation in the car.
“Ha, what a joke,” Arlis continued as she plopped on their bed. “It’s a good thing she didn’t know
how badly I had stage fright.” She made a face. “It’s crazy. I love performing, but you’d never guess it by the way I get so
nervous that my mind goes blank and oops, I forget my song again.” Arlis pretended to faint on the bed and Misty couldn’t help but
laugh.
“Maybe what you need is more experience,” Misty said.
“Knock, knock. May I come in?”
“Sure Dad,” the girls answered in unison.
Their father leaned against the doorframe, jamming his hands in his pockets. “Girls, the lady who
just called is having a wedding in a month.” He paused, “She would like one of you to sing for it!”
Misty’s heart leapt. Sing at a wedding?
Dad continued, “However she didn’t specify which girl. The wedding is still a ways off, so you’ll
have a little time to figure it out.”
After their Dad left, Misty looked at Arlis. Her sister’s big gray eyes shone like stars. Oh, no,
Misty thought. She wants to do it, too.
Misty slumped onto the bed and began brushing her long brown hair.
Arlis said as if in a reverie, “Maybe I could sing ‘Love’s Promise’.”
“You?” Misty swallowed. “Dad said that Miss Carey did not specify which one should sing. Why should
you get to do it?”
Her sister looked offended. “Because I’m seventeen and you’re fourteen, that’s why.”
Misty fumed. “What does that have to do with it?” She wanted to add, Besides, you’re the one that
gets stage fright, not me.
Arlis glared at her and took a deep breath. “Hey, let’s just drop it for now,” she said, and stalked
out of the room.
Later that evening when the family joined in the living room to read together, the subject was
brought up. “So,” Mom said, “what do you girls think about the opportunity to sing at Tabitha Carey’s wedding?”
The girls glanced at each other. “Well,” Arlis said as if she was reluctant to say it. ““We – um –
well – it’s really neat.” She looked over at Misty.
Why did she have to look at me? Misty thought as she stared at her book.
“We can’t decide which one should do it,” Arlis finally said.
Mom dropped the subject, but it stayed on Misty’s mind the rest of the evening.
Even while sleep settled over the house for the night, Misty was still trying to sort out her
thoughts. She almost wished Dad or Mom would just tell one of them to sing. Almost. It would simplify things, but she was pretty
sure that if their parents were to choose, Arlis would get to sing because she was the oldest. So Misty held her peace, but it
seemed to her that sleep would never come.
The sun was peeping over the rim of the world the next morning when Misty went out to do the
chickens. A golden glow sparkled on the dewy grass and made the world around her look bright and clean. She opened the door to the
chicken run to let the hens outside, but her thoughts were far from smelly chickens and dirty water pans. What if she got to sing?
After all, why should Arlis get to sing, even if she was older? She was the one who got to do everything. Misty sighed and looked
around.
The sun was peeping through the foliage and drew lacy patterns on the smooth lawn, which ran to a
line of trees. It made Misty remember when Arlis and she were small. They used to imagine that the grove of trees marked the
beginning of an enchanted wood. How silly we were, Misty thought as she strolled to the house. But in a way, she wished
that they were small again and did not have to care about such things as who should get the position of “importance”.
After breakfast, Misty went upstairs to have her “morning meaningful”, which is what her mom called
spending time with the Lord. It seemed hard for her to concentrate on her Bible reading today, so laying it aside she dropped her
dark haired head on her folded arms.
“God, I’m having trouble with this wedding thing and my temper. I really want to sing at it, but I
know Arlis does, too.” Misty sniffed and blew her nose. “Besides I don’t like being mad at Arlis. Do I somehow think that getting
mad is going to get me somewhere? Help me to look to You when I want to blow up.”
After her prayer time Misty felt better. At least until she met Arlis in the stairway. Arlis had
that starry look in her eyes again. “I was just thinking what I should wear if we decide to let me sing. What a hard choice!”
It sounded like Arlis thought she would get the solo. Misty felt like saying, Well, I’m sure the
dress you mow the lawn in would be just fine. But she managed to restrain herself.
Later that day Misty went to their gable room to write a letter. She noticed that Arlis was reading
on their bed. She also saw that Arlis was lying partly on Misty’s side of the bed. Her temper flared up, but she grabbed a pen and
left the room before she said something that would start another quarrel.
Slipping outside where the warm breeze played with the leaves of trees, Misty ambled past
raspberries lining the side of the house. The smell of ripe berries tickled her nose, and she snatched a few to munch. In the dog
kennel nearby, Skye the collie basked in the sun. The fiery feeling inside began to fade as Misty looked at Skye. His affectionate
brown eyes seem to hold worlds of wisdom.
“Why is it,” Misty whispered, “that when Arlis and I want the same thing, like
this solo, that there is friction between us. The teensy weensy things are a mountain of their own.
Why can’t we work things out better?”
Skye licked her face as if to say, “I understand. But you’ll just have get over it.”
Over the next couple of hours no one brought up the subject. It gave Misty time to think. Why did
she want to sing? Was it to bless Tabitha and her future husband or was it to have people recognize her, Misty Sidney, as a great
singer? If it was to get glory, Misty knew she should not sing at all. And as much as she hated to admit it, Misty knew that it
was because she did want the glory. All the glory.
That afternoon she wrote a short note to Arlis.
Dear Arlie,
I have decided to let you sing because I know my motives are not good. Besides,
I know you’ll do a great job.
Love,
Misty
She left the note in her sister’s music folder and went to her room. There lying on her desk was a
note.
Dear Misty,
I have acted so selfishly and wish to drop the whole issue. I know that you would
love to sing as much as I would. You may sing and may God help us to work things out better in the future.
Your loving sister,
Arlis
Misty could not believe it. Just when she was beginning to feel some peace at
having given up her
will, Arlis said she could sing!
Misty found Arlis in the kitchen. “Um, I just read your note, Arlis,” she said. “It means a lot to
me. Did you find my note?”
Arlis smiled. “Yes. If it weren’t so serious, it would be funny, wouldn’t it? First we fight over
who should get to do it, then we argue because we want the other one to shine. So save us some arguing, Miss, and do it, okay?”
Misty hugged Arlis. “No. It wouldn’t be good for me. You do it. Or I guess we could always call Miss
Carey back and tell her we can’t decide who should do it, and see if she can have someone else sing,” Misty suggested.
Arlis laughed. “How are we ever going to solve this thing? In some ways it would be nice to be able
to forget the whole deal. But what about Tabitha? She might have to change some of her plans. We would not want to disappoint her
if she really wants one of us.”
Misty nodded. “So why don’t you sing, Arlie? After all, you are the oldest.” She tweaked her
sister’s hair and dashed out of the kitchen before Arlis could answer.
“Misty, you come back here.” Arlis laughed and chased Misty up the stairs to their
room. Misty
tried to hold the door shut, but Arlis managed to push it open inch by inch.
“Be still, you silly goose,” Arlis panted, giggling.
Misty laughed back at her. It felt so good to be back to normal with her sister, almost like twins.
Almost like –
“Arlis!” Misty exclaimed. “You know what we could do?”
Arlis got a strange look in her eyes.
“We could – “ Misty started to say only to find that Arlis had said it at exactly the same time.
They giggled, waiting for the other person to finish.
“We could,” both said again and burst into laughter.
Misty finished their sentence. “We could sing a duet!” ©
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